sorry

Sobrang dame na ngyayare ngayon
Hindi ko na maintindihan sa Sobrang dame
Ayoko ng Mag salita ayoko ng mag react


Masaya ka ngayon, Biglang kukunin sayo
at babalik sa katotohan na Hindi ka Ok.


Nakaka pagod ... Nakaka sawa na
Mama papa ate miss ko na kayo
sana andito kayo ayoko masanay ng laging ganto
ang sakit na .. ang sakit sakit
ayoko masanay na Ok lang na umiiyak na masanay na
nasasaktan


Hindi ko alam kung san ako nag kamali
bakit biglang gumulo ? hindi ko na alam kung
san ako lulugar


hindi ako Ok. hindi na ko masaya.
hindi na katulad ng dati ..
baket ganto ?




*wag ka mag alala
hindi pa ko suicidal malayooooooo at malabo mang yare yun





Pero hindi ko na kaya yung pain
Kahit alam ko na pag katapos nito mas
magiging better person ako .. Hindi ko alam kung
san mag sisimula .. May problema ba talaga o
Pinoproblema ko lang ..?





Mama ate .. sana andito kayo
Kailangan ko kayo, mama miss na kita
sana kaya ko sabihin yung problema ko
sana kaya ko .. pero alam ko ako rin naman
may kasalanan ..
Ma kung andito ka alam ko naman maiintindihan mo ko
Ma sana kayakap kita kailangan ka ng baby mo




Ate sana kasama kita alam ko maiintindihan
mo ko, alam ko ikaw yung unang unang mag
papatahan saken . kaya ko naman sabihin sayo
kahit malayo tayo , kaya lang alam ko
maaksaya ko lang oras mo sa mga gantong bagay
sana katulad parin ng date na ako yung priority mo
ate miss ko na yung date .. kahit anung problema alam
ko makikinig ka . ate hindi ko na alam kung pano
mawawala yung sama ng loob ko
ate kailangan kita , kahit alam ko na ang korni ng problema
ko :) sana kaya parin naten mabalik yung date
ate miss na miss na kita kailangan ka ng kapatid mo







Bullshit !

MY FINAL FANTASY

LAST FRIDAY I JUST GOT A NEWS

WHICH ONE YOU WANT TO KNOW FIRST ..

The Bad or Good

HMMM .. uHKKEEII GOOD CHOICE

MY FIRST LOVE/ NOW HE'S MY EX BOY FRIEND SAYS ;

" SANA PALA HINDI KO NALANG MINAHAL SI JAN"


WHAT GOOD NEWS IS
- MINAHAL NYA PALA TALAGA AKO , SALAMAT SA DYOS


WHAT BAD ABOUT IT ?

- WALANG KASING SAKIT YUNG PAPANTAY
SA ILANG SIMPLENG SALITANG YON.

WERE ALMOST 4 MONTHS SEPARATED
I CUT ALL THOSE POSSIBLE COMMUNICATION
MALAMANG SAWANG SAWA KANA SA STORYA NA TO
PANO PA KO ?

4 MONTHS NA KAMENG WALA PERO
THE PAINS STILL LIVES ON , NADADAGDAGAN PA
HINDI KO ALAM KUNG BAKET HINDI KO MAKUHANG
MAGALIT SA KANYA , KAHIT ANG SAKIT SAKIT NA NG PAKIRAMDAM KO
AT NGAYON KO LANG NAKUHA YUNG SAGOT

WE/I ALMOST HAD ALL THE HAPPIEST MEMORIES
IT'S MY DAMN FIRST TIME TO FALL INLOVE
I DO REALLY FELT THE MAGIC ..
I DO FELT LOVING SOMEONE WITHOUT EXPECTING IN RETURN
I ONCE FELT TO BE HAPPY,NA YUNG MGA ARAW NA NAGING MASAYA AKO SAKANYA YUN YUNG MGA ARAW NA WALA MAKAKAPALIT NG ANUMANG HALAGA
I ONCE FELT TO NEEDED AND LOVED .

THAT'S WHY I DON'T FEEL ANY ANGER TOWARDS HIM
THOUGH I EXPERIENCED THE WORST HE BRING OUT MY BEST
BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I DO ALWAYS PRAY TO PAPA GOD
NA MAHANAP NYA NA YUNG BABAENG MAG PAPASAYA SAKANYA
SANA MAPATAWAD NYA KO SA MGA KASALANAN NAGAWA KO
AND I STILL SAY THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME A CHANCE TO
LOVE AND TO BE LOVED ..


HINDI KO LANG INEXPECT NA SASABIHIN NYA YON ..
MARAMI NG PAIN YUNG NGYARE SAMEN PERO
ETO YUNG PINAKA MASAKET SA LAHAT ..
"SANA HINDI KO NALANG PALA MINAHAL SI JAN"

Bullshit! it never cross to my mind to
say that, I'd never regret i loved and knew you
i am really in shock that turns to emotional breakdown
until now, every time i remember those words i couldn't
help but cry and reminisce all our happiest days we had


MUSH :

Hindi ko na alam kung ano pa sasabihin ko sayo
Tama na , ang sakit sakit na kase.. hindi ko alam
kung san ba mas masakit yung sana ba hindi mo nalang
ako minahal o yung isipin mo na ako yung hindrance
sa pag mamahal mo sa kaibigan ko ..
Sana nga Hindi mo nalang ako minahal
Sana hindi ko nalang naramdaman na minahal mo ko ,
baka sakaling ako pa yung may mali kung bakit hindi mo ko
minahal .. pero mush naramdaman ko kase eh ..
kung ganto lang yung mangyayare sana hindi nalang talaga .. Sobrang daming
Pain na na gusto ko ng magmakawa at lumuhod na wag ng malaman
pa yun , Gusto ko paniwalain yung sarili ko
na Minahal talaga natin ang isa't isa gusto ko parin
maniwala na Minahal mo talaga ko, na naging totoo
tayo sa isa't isa .. pero sa mga Ngyayare Mas lalo ko lang kase nararamdaman na Lie lng
yung relationship naten .. yun nga siguro yung masakit sa lahat
Our relationship was all made of fun ...

though it was all made of Lies .. I'd still THANK god DUMATING KA SA BUHAY KO
Thank god he once let me to feel the happiness respect and the magic of love .










~
I felt sorry for myself for posting this crap again









JAN ..

STUDY HARD PARTY HARDER

Ungas! wala ako dyan hahah !

Last Saturday we had our Acquaintance party at School
it's Exclusive for IHM and Tourism students only

It's damn FUN ! I never thought i could dance like shit
It's not wild as you see on the bar ohhhhkeii !
but woo ! that Pharteyyy is sooooo DROOL !
we arrived at 6:00 *i think* and when we step on the

dance floor yiikees it's SUWiiiT dance darn it ! so we just
stay at the table but when the Music turns to Hip we all

hit the dance floor and Groove like there's no other day come ,

Let the photos do the talking

angel,mee^^.donna.tin.janine - going to tagaytay ^^ hoooray!
some bar at tagaytay ^^

YSaY,Angel,Ly ann,MEEE ^^

AtTagaytay wuth my TWIN !! love her so much

Jancaholic FT. Petecrack

shirt-penshoppe short-Fsquare thights-sm dept. store boots-Thrift ^^ top hat/accesories-SMdept.store tie-Folded and hung Jancaholic and Bevs Geisha daw haha

• As you can see, there's a lot of Pictures .. thanks to Ysayand angel , Their are my official Photogs .. *kaway to angel she's reading my entry haha
  
• HooooooRrrrrAaAaYYyY ! for me i Saw my Crush even if he's not IHM student, he's just there to see me !! *in my world haha ! nahh
• It's our Chumxarii!!! me and my best friend MAE *chumz was celebrate also this day our 3rd anniversarry ^^It's not too late to greet us !
  
• my friend jhon brought his car and we went to tagaytay plus win !! i didn't spend any money for this hop . hahah
  
• jhon and some of my peers left me at the bar, and i choose to stay with my chums with her classmates , and we walked almost a hundred meters oh ghad!! that was a painful but Fun experience ^^

• ohhhhh phullleeezee let this day happened again ^^
  

And It Ends at Tagaytay *don't know what bar is it
but it's near at starbucks .. ,
YEY !! for August 15 !!

THIS DAY IS A WIN !!!!!

A LETTER TO MY EX BOYFRIEND ['S] EX GIRL FRIEND

For this past days I've been receiving Hate mails
ohhhhhh myyyyyyy ! as far as i know
i am one of the most loving and Understanding friend
*ask my friends, or be my friend to know *wink

I just got a message I just got a
message i wonder who it's from ... Ohhhh !
It's a Message from my EX boyfriend's Ex girlfriend
how Ironic Isn't it ?

As much as possible I don't want to post this cause It'll be ruining my pages ..



But i can't take this, I'm a Monster in their own world *moi EX and Bf's Ex-GF*
since we broke up i cut all the possible communication,



Wednesday morning i log into my old account
just because my friend said this cute little MUMU[my Ex boy friend's ex]
is looking for me .. I wonder why ? we've never been friends

Just a Quick Recap

and just because all of you know *i guess
i had a Cyber-relationship which is my Ex boy friend
all throughout we've been together this MuMu[ex Bf's ex]
always there to crash our relationship , i don't mind her
since she's only 14 yrs old , ghad ! sooo makati na !
and the day comes My bitter sweet relationship with my boy friend finally
ended. but still this MuMu did'nt stop , she's stalking me and she's there to pissed me of Niao! hope she enjoy disappointments

Here's a short Coversation :

§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: jan pwede b mg pM???
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: gs2 ku lng sbhin n nd tlga aq ung ng message sa fs mo nuon!
^^JANN: nahh .. ok lang
let's just move on . it's been a decades na ata ..
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: eh glit n glit k kc skin eh.. sa mess m.. pti ung kaibigan u
^^JANN : HUWAAAT ! haha ..
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: ala un lng gs2 ku sbhn n nd aq un. ng mess..
^^JANN: with Celine , hindi ko control kung ano man sabihin nya sainyo ..
she has her own view and she's educated enough to know what's right or not
ohhhhkkkeei
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: .. gs2 kita add sa fs pwede buh?
^^JANN: ghad! ndi nako nagamit ng FS eh
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: ok ok sbhn m controlin nya srili nya. kc nd nmn xa ksli eh.
^^JANN: first thing first , kasali na sya since gustong ligawan sya ni reinier ata sweet revenge nyaha!
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: bwahaha.. lnghya tlga un c reinier
^^JANN: well anyway anung msg ba un ?
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: ewn ko npkhaba ng cnbi mo.. my mnga numero pnga ung cnbi m
^^JANN: un ba , that's just a blessing and good bye ayoko na kase ng any communication sakanya at sayo
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: ng kita nb kayu. hanggang ngayun glit kpb? haha
^^JANN: never naman ako nagalit sakanya, gustong gusto ko nga magalit haha
wala naman syang kasalanan ..
^^JANN: basta mabuhay lang ako na wala kayo ok na ko
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: hahaha.. awtch hah.. ayus k rn tumira eh nuh.
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: tnung ko kung ng kita nb kau
^^JANN: nahh .. wag nang paikot ikot let's just straight to the point
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: un n nga lng tnung ko. nd mupa masagot
^^JANN: ohhh sorry what's that again ?
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: taray %%.. haha sbi ko kung ng kita nb kau.
^^JANN: nope we never did ..
§hårm§'z* ~ Löv§ U: ahh okay



This is only Reaction i had .....
HUUUUUUWAAATTT ! A PACHYDERM !


To my Dearest Ex Boy Freind


c'mmon honnney I don't care if you still have a communication
with my friends , I SRSLY don't mind if you Court her(a very close friend of mine) ..
just Think ! Our Story has been ended and were starting a new
chapter of our Lives, so Phuuuullleeezzze ! don't ever think again
I was the one who's putting the Pessimistic attitude
to her .. She Has her own Decission what's good or bad to her
Unfortunately honney .. You are Bad to her health, You can't blame her
what she sees to our relationship might happen to the both of you



To my Dearest Ex Boy Friend's Ex Girl Friend

c'mmon honney it's been a months and were living our own
lives now , Haven't you heard Dignity? Pride? look it up
pleaaaseeee ... i don't want to make any senseless fight
especially when it comes to not worth it boys , how cheap is that ?
Your only 14 , still a baby you should play *not a fire *
enjoy your childhood grow up Enjoy , I Know you still Love
"our EX" *evil.laugh* but Phullllleeeezeee don't evolve yourself
to this kind of Situation. were his EX .. Be it !



~

uhhhkeeeii ?! Stop Bugging me You and Your ex
or Else I'll squeeeeeeeeezzzee your Head till it drop
Grab and stretch your Ears till you didn't realize
that HELLLLLLLOOO ! WERE LIVING OUR DIFFERENT LIVES.......
NOW STOP BUGGING ME !





as you can see/read I'm speaking/typing Straight to the Point
I hope and I pray , This will be the Last Conversation
so help me God ..






smooches Jan

GG NA SIR !

In St. Jude we gave importance to our teachers, i made an entry to one of my most FAB. teacher
who is it ? READ!

HOWKEI ... I'm quite ecstatic and energized right now
since i saw my crush *hides* for just a second urgh!

it should be posted last week but since
my connection was down *thanks to smart bro
i can't surf anything and i'm not comfortable to write
or post if i'm not using my old aged suppah computahh !


Last week *i guess i had a chance *a chance?
to talk to my Third most Favorite Mentors
he's one of the coooooolest teachers I've ever met
SIR JOSE RAOUL GARCIA
*ehem ! By the way he's reading my blog *kaway to Sir ! *
he's teaching .. uhmmm .. something about computers
web developments *uh if i'm not mistaken?
troubleshooting and meni murr !

I vividly remember the time when we finally met
it's uhh.. *suddenly forgot
I'm a junior high transfer student who was more
eager to took Computer class rather than math
*shhh .. it took 2 weeks *i guess since we transfer student
met our ... very COOL teacher in computer ..
*kaway to sir! :D


As far as i remembered i was Late *kelan ba hindi?
and since I'm a transfer student i'm wearing civilian clothes *which is soo drool
My statement shirt catch sir jeff attention ..
don't ask. i forgot what shirt is it.uhhki !
and since then i/we enjoyed listening to him it seems like a friend is teaching you
he really had
a good sense of humor .


I am really bow down the way he teach us
he know what he teach , he know how to catch our
attention , *computer is not so boring subject well of course
were living in the modernized world ..
BUT ! memorizing HTML, codes and whutever
Hurt some of my classmate .. hehe yeah ! not much of me
i find computer subject much more interesting than the others
so now i wonder why i didn't take up Info. tech nor computer related
courses .. ;___;

Sir jeff is very close to us especially our *ehem section
St. Joseph *screeeeeeeaaaaaam !
alot of teachers was embarrassed annoyed to our section
some says were the BLACK sheep SECTION
*innocent. but a lot of them we st. joseph brought
the most joy to them? or him/her
and sir GARCIA is one of the teachers who was not
tired to keep his patience though *st. joseph
our section was soo love by him .. Marami samin ang
iniisip nalang eh "si Sir nalang ang hindi nagagalit satin"
but some of us "the not insensitive" know we sometimes
pissed him off . But as he said on our convo.. "syempre dapat
hapi hapi parin in the end of the day "


Sir Jeff was also the first teacher who is really
love giving trivia .. at dahil dun nung third year kame
marami ako nakita na TRIVIA about their subjects are posted
on their Bullettins ..pero hindi lang pala TRIVIA about subjects meron
si sir dahil kahit ang NEWEST at HOTTEST intriga sa School eh alam nya
daig pa ang papparazzi .. Magugulat ka nalang at alam nya na
break na ang Crush mo at ang GF nya ..




Last week we had a CONVO . *conversation
we were bit emotional , it seems he really misses us
and me yours truly, misses SIR jeff too HE'S LIKE A BROTHHA !*brother* to us and the way
i live the high school life, i miss every part of St. Jude
from the faculty down to the staff .. Ngek!
haha ! but it is sincerely true ! Pramis !

CLICK THE PHOTOS TO ENLARGED *WENK!

"bihira Kc ako mapamahal sa studyante nag kataon kayo pa"

St. JOSEPH !!! isn't that sweet ?
*tears*
we badly misses you too SIR !
kung mababasa lang nila yung sinabe nyo baka
maiyak kame sa saya ..
Sir Jeff is one of the teachers who believed in our talent
he always cheer us up ! I'll assure you no matter bad the day
he had you can see him smiling and goofing around with other
teachers especially Mr. Bocalan whatta tandem ! Kabog ang perya !
isama pa si sir marvin kumpleto na araw mo makita mo lang sila hahaha !
;] Gahd !

TIP para maging Close kay sir

• Hindi mahirap maka Close si Sir kahit sino kina kausap nyan , minsan pag walang klase [?] eh iikutin nya ang buong gilid ng room maka usap ka lang , Syempre About sa TRIVIA .. latest Break ups.. Newest Couple .. sabay kilig haha !

• Madaling kausap si sir, Ngumite ka lang close na kayo hehehe ! mapa assignments projects or problema mo sa ka relasyon mo may advice yan ..
  

• Masayahin si sir , Kung gusto mo talaga maging suppah close mag baon ka ng JOKE o TRIVIA para buong Klase nakaka relate at makikitawa kung mapahiya ka ..haha ! kidding aside madaling mapatawa si SIR .. hindi kapa Nag sa salita naka ngite na yan .. hindi ka luge haha !
  

• Techie boy si SIR! lahat ng TRENDS at Latest may alam sya .. kaya kung gusto mo maka usap madali lang Download mo ang Latest ViRUs tapos mag tanong ka .. haha ! [kurni] pero kung may problema ka talaga sa supppah Computttah mo madaling lapitan si sir .. student discount,

• Sa bawat Event sa School , Asahan mo si sir Jeff ang Photographer ! kaya minsa lang mag pa picture sa kanya .. kung wala syang trabaho GRAB THE OPPORTUNITY ! minsan lang yun ..

• Hindi lang teacher si SIR . para na syang TROPA samen .. [at kahit ibang teachers naman sa SJ ganun ] pero madalas mo sya makikita sa Canteen Comp Lab at syempre sa ADMIN
  kasama si sir shooh at espadero ;]

• Hindi mahirap maka sundo si Sir , Basta Judean ka Close na kayo ! ... d'ba ! d'ba! sir !
  

yey ! did you read it ?
i'll be changing my url to JANCAHOLIC
i've been thinking it for about a weeks
sir jeff help me which to choose Jan'xshop or JANCAHAOLIC
jan'xshop is very close name to me i've been using this for
a year .. but i guess JANCAHOLIC WILL DO THE BLAST !!!
(i'll change my theme too*this photograph is proof* .. so it will be a dead weekdays to me
roar!)

• NO FAVORITISM , EVEN IT SHOWED HAHA ! ALL TEACHERS AT ST. JUDE ARE SOO DROOL ! AND PROFESSIONAL ENOUGH .
  

• KISS ASS ? NIAHA ! DONE WITH IT ! FRESHMAN BS-IHM STUDENT HERE PLOX!

• SORRY FOR THE POOR WATERMARKS .. I'M NO GOOD AT IT *hides*

smooches Jancaholic

"A PRAYER FOR A HAPPY DEATH"

RAINY SATURDAY MORNING I WOKE UP EARLY
NOTE: WHY DO I ALWAYS WAKE UP SOO EARLY
ON WEEKENDS AND NOT ON WEEKDAYS ...

I TURN ON THE T.V AND IT SAID THAT
FORMER PRES. CORRY AQUINO PASSED AWAY
AND UNFORTUNATELY I WAS WEARING YELLOW TOP


WHAT AMAZE ME IS, SHE'S VERY VERY STRONG WOMAN
SHE LEAD THE COUNTRY , AND ABLE TO BE A MOTHER
AT THE SAME TIME


AND WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT
SHE WROTE A PRAYER FOR HER
DEATH..? IT'S "A PRAYER FOR A HAPPY DEATH"
*IT'S NOT ACTUALLY THE EXACT WORD/PHRASE BUT FOR WHAT I UNDERSTAND, DO BLESS THE FAMILY, LET THEM CONTINUE
WHAT THEY STARTED, .. LET THE FAMILY DO NOT GRIEVE

AFTER I HEARD THE PRAYER I FOUND MYSELF
CRYING



I ALSO NOTICE THE PEOPLE POWER ..
SO TRAGIC BUT YOU SURELY FEEL THE
UNITY OF THE FILIPINO WHO FOUGHT FOR DEMOCRACY
DANG! MY BAD AT THAT TIME I'M JUST ONLY
A FLYING COCOON *does cocoon fly?
I WANT TO EXPERIENCED PEOPLE POWER




SMOOCHES
JAN ;_;

I LOVE YOU'R SCHOOL !

BEFORE, WAY BACK WHEN WE WERE HIGH SCHOOL
CHOOSING A BIG! POPULAR! UNIVERSITY IS A MUST
IT SHOULD BE LIKE THIS AND THAT ..




NOW
AS I OBSERVED AND WITNESS


HAVING A BOYFRIEND
STUDYING AT THE POPULAR UNIVERSITY
IS ONE OF THE REQUIREMENTS NOWADAYS




WHAT THE HECK ?!


SMOOCHES
JANCAHOLIC [=